Well, it's been 2 years and I can't really say that it's any better or easier. I'm still reminded of Dad regularly. The kids will do something and I will think, oh I should invite Dad, or I'll see an item in the store and think Dad would like that for his birthday or Christmas or whatever.

My life at home is now at the point where it is practically a joke. Brent frequently stays out all night, he hasn't slept here for the last 6 Friday nights. He and I haven't shared a bed for at least two years, though he has occasionally come to me for sex. The last time, about 3 weeks ago, I just you.

Once again we are hitting that time of year when he is unemployed, so that means money is tight and as a result his temper because worse. Both kids have asked me to open new bank accounts for them so their father can stop taking their money. Funny thing is, money is tight, but he can still go golfing, buy beer, go out to the bar after baseball, etc.

I need to accept that our marriage is over and move on. Financially, I can't afford to leave but emotionally, I can't afford to stay. Something has got to give, I need to make a choice and soon.